•WARNING: This post is long as hell and not checked for mistakes so this is your warning it might be a hot mess haha!
So it’s 7:30 AM as I write this. I’ll post it much later but I felt like writing a little bit now. We’re on our way back home to Virginia and driving down some tiny back roads in South Carolina. It’s raining, and getting colder so the fog is rising. It looks like something out of a horror movie.
I’m exhausted. It took almost five hours last night between my mom, grandma and myself to clean our condo and get ready to leave today. We got less than six hours of sleep and we’re supposed to stop in Richmond to visit a sick relative. It’s gonna be a long day. At least I’ll be tired by the time I get home. I can hit the hay and be ready to go back to reality at 6 AM tomorrow for work. I’m not ready at all to come back from vacation, but I’ve missed my kids and I’m excited to see them all. Plus it’s only a four day work week, so it’s not all that bad.
I won’t have another week long break until at least July. My school is year round except for a week in August which is kind of a bummer. I’m envious of my best friend who is an elementary school teacher. It’s times like these that make me consider going back to grad school to get my licensure and certification to teach older kids. But I have a fantastic job now. What would be perfect is more time off! 😂 I really shouldn’t complain. Over the course of a year I have 5 weeks off, which is way more than most people. I lucked out on this job for sure! It just always makes me sad to leave the beach and know I can’t come back whenever I want. My days of being a college student on long breaks are over forever, and I always think about that when I manage to get out of town for a little while. But it makes me appreciate my time here more, for sure.
Now that I’m on the road back home, I’m ready to just keep going and get into the swing of things. This coming week will be my last week of my normal diet. I plan on getting healthy groceries this weekend to kick start my resolution for this year (healthy body, mind, and soul). I have no willpower whatsoever when it comes to junk food but I am so ready to just feel good again. I gained a whole bunch of weight this past year because I was constantly stressed. When I’m stressed, I eat. And I eat comfort food. If only I ate healthy when I was stressed, where would I be now? 😂 The goal is to lose 40 pounds by July, when my friends and I are supposed to go back to the lake. Then I’ll reevaluate my diet and lifestyle- see what works, what doesn’t, change what I need to. I’m so determined this time, and I have a desire to become healthy. Before it was just about losing weight. Now it’s about changing my lifestyle and becoming a wholly healthy individual, starting from the inside out. I hope I can keep up with this motivation.
Another thing I want to do is keep a good thoughts jar. Last year at this time I became so depressed and dismal I lost motivation and love for life altogether. I want to do something this year to help me keep track of the good. So, every day this year I’ll try and write down a good memory or thought on a little piece of paper and put it in a jar. On New Year’s Eve I’ll go back into the jar and read what I wrote. This ties into the healthy mind thing- if I keep note of the positive, maybe the bad won’t seem so bad.
Of course this is super simple. I’m sure there will be days I won’t want to write anything at all. No year is completely perfect. But I’m going to try and keep better track of things. Maybe I’ll journal more and try to blog more. I plan on getting a camera, just a simple point and shoot, to vlog special occasions. One thing I always regret is not taking enough pictures or videos of important stuff, and maybe with a cute little camera (maybe the Canon N2?) I’ll be more inclined to do it! I’ve got some cool stuff lined up to do in 2017, I don’t want to miss it.
In the immediate future, I mean until February, I’m not doing too much. We have assessments for the kids this month and I’m nervous. I’ve heard it’s a lot of hard work and there will be face to face parent conferences. I love my parents that we have but I need to work on my interactions with some of them. And I need to keep track of the milestones our students should be able to meet. Some of them are pretty behind and that’s a little scary to me. But we’ll work on it. This’ll be a learning curve for me.
February 26 will be my 6th anniversary with my high school friends! Well, it’s been much longer than that. But that’s the day we got our group name- The Pack- and kind of established we’d all be stuck with each other forever. The last couple of weeks I’ve grown to love them all over again. Being away in college for 5 years I felt left out and kind of displaced, but I spent Christmas Eve with them and felt as though I’d never been away. Michelle is back in our lives as of this week as well and moving back home. She and I fell out of touch with each other after our freshman year, and she’s been in Tennessee since the summer so we haven’t heard from her at all. I guess with the New Year year coming up she wanted to start fresh and realized she missed us a lot. We missed her too! She spent NYE with the other girls and they sent me videos of them together. She’s so excited to be back in the thick of our friendship and it makes my heart so full. Since Molly left the group things haven’t been perfect, but they’ve been better. We’re stronger now and most people are blown away that we still call our best friends from high school our best friends. But even though things may have been fickle at times and I questioned my place with them, I’ve re-evaluated that since I’ve moved back home. I’m so glad they’re still in my life and so excited to celebrate our anniversary and the year ahead with them. 😊
In other news; I’m trying to see if I can get up to NYC again. The last time we went we took the bus and on the way back home I actually met a guy. 😅 the bus was full af and my sister and her boyfriend got a seat together. This guy saw me standing there like a deer in the headlights and told me I could sit next to him. The funny thing is we didn’t start talking until the last 30 minutes of the trip. I was a little grumpy and tired and slept most of the way. But towards the end we started talking and he added me on Facebook. I’ve been talking to him off and on since Thanksgiving and he wants to see me. He actually lives near-ish to me, so if I can get over my nerves I think we might go out. TRUTH TIME: I’ve never date anyone before- I’ve talked to people but never actually had a relationship with anyone. The closest I ever got to that was with Nathan last year (which blew up in my face smh) and then Cole and I were “talking” for a while before he got a girlfriend in his hometown. So I’m nervous. This guy is very clearly interested and I am too but I’m so shy and nervous and gahhh. So we’ll see how it goes. 2017 is looking interesting for sure! 🤗
Well this post is long as hell. I’ve been writing for 40 minutes! I just needed something cathartic to do after the stress of trying to get out of the condo this morning. Thanks for letting me vent. If anyone is reading this right now I hope you’re having a fantastic second day of the new year! We’ll chat later.